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This Too Shall Suck

nytheatre.com q&a preview by Matt Graham
July 29, 2012

What is your job on this show?
writer/performer.

Where were you born? Where were you raised? Where did you go to school?
I keep trying to repress this memory, but since you asked; Indianapolis, Indianapolis, and a high school in Indianapolis (which I dropped out of) Conservative place; They have a fringe festival, which I compare to Nazis having a seder.

If you're not a New Yorker: what are you most looking forward to doing and seeing (apart from the festival) while you're here?
I am a New Yorker, but a misanthropic hermit, so I look forward to seeing historic soho for the first time. I plan to bring a disposable camera.

Are there any cautions or warnings you’d like to make about the show (e.g., not appropriate for little kids)?
The show is hardly appropriate for anybody, because I'm inappopriate. Little kids no, because i talk about sex. Touchy people no, because I talk about suicide. New Yorkers no, because I talk about God

Which famous New Jerseyite would like your show the best: Snooki, Bruce Springsteen, Thomas Edison?
Edison. Not only am I inventive, but i sweat so much that i am often about 99% perspiration

If you had ten million dollars that you had to spend on theatrical endeavors, how would you use the money?
Big budget porno production of Alice in Wonderland, because the one from the 70s sucked, although 10 mil won't get many mainstream Hollywood stars. I would rather use the money for a cat haven, to be honest. Maybe I could run a cat circus with rescued cats?